Reason for Visit — “Popcorn Injury”

January 6, 2016January 6, 2016 / jrmilson / Leave a comment

Little Red Bear and I were simply making some popcorn for a snack while taking a break from writing. As I was dumping the popped corn into a large wooden bowl, one of the last remaining unpopped kernels, apparently very upset and angry having been awoken from its slumber, decided to seek revenge on its tormentors and “POPPED!”

Hit me right in the eyeglasses! If I had not been wearing glasses, it would have hit me smack in the left eye. With no reaction time at all, I had no idea that an annoyed and highly agitated kernel of corn could fly so fast. Fortunately, bouncing off of my glasses as it did, no harm done.

But can you even imagine going to the doctor with something like that? First of all, there would be all the Urgent Care Forms to fill out–

“Reason for Visit – Popcorn Injury.”

The doctor would come into the room trying to conceal a smirk, saying something along the lines of — “Attacked by a kernel of popcorn, were you? I don’t know if I’ve ever treated one of these before. We didn’t cover Popcorn Injuries in my Emergency Room training. I don’t suppose this falls under the heading of ‘Blunt Force Trauma’, does it? Because I’m real good with that. We may have to refer you to a specialist. I wonder if Dr. Redenbacher is available for a consult today?”

And then it would go on, of course. “Hit you right in the eye, did it? Boy, don’t you know you’re supposed to keep a lid closed on those poppers and not be looking down into them while you’re cooking? Have you ever used one of these complex cooking devices without supervision before? Maybe next time you should consider saving a little longer to purchase the Deluxe Model Popper. You know, the one with the lid? Another inch up and over and that thing woulda nailed you right between the eyes and laid you out cold on the floor. You’re lucky to still be with us here today, son. Do you think your relatives would have sent flowers to your funeral or popcorn balls?”

Yep. I can just imagine the whole medical staff having had a go at my “Popcorn Injury”. Thank goodness for eyeglasses and an embarrassment averted! Never knew popcorn could be so temperamental and will be approaching it with a new level of respect and danger in the future. Kind of like a rattlesnake. Just to be safe. Maybe I’ll just let Little Red Bear do it. But, being a bear, he doesn’t wear eyeglasses, so I suppose not. Will just have to be more careful myself. That is an Urgent Care visit I do not want to make.

Have a wonderful day, and surprise someone with an unexpected act of kindness along the way! Thanks as always for visiting! — Jim (and Red!)

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“The Adventures of Little Red Bear” Short Stories on Amazon.

About an Uncommonly Special Bear and His Friends

A Special “Thank You!” for Readers and What’s Ahead in the New Year!

January 2, 2016 / jrmilson / 4 Comments

A special New Year’s “Thank You!” to everyone who has followed along the past year on the Blog, my Author Facebook Page, on Twitter and with “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” short stories book collection released in June!

A few quick hits for New Year’s. I am not a big numbers guy, not seeking to build great legions of followers for the sole sake of impressive numbers and ego stroking. But when you write or put creative work out there for the enjoyment of others, numbers are a way of gauging whether there is any interest or if your work is fostering the intended enjoyment for others.

So it was encouraging to see that my Blog site continues to grow, having achieved a 60% increase in both visits and followers in 2015, was visited over 4,400 times and reached a new high averaging 20 visits per day in December and now being read in 86 countries! “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” continues to gain new readers internationally, and has been very positively received. Twitter followers are nearing the 10,000 mark worldwide. We keep growing together, one positive message at a time.

To me, this is an indication and further encouragement that there still remains a receptive audience and place for enjoyable clean, uplifting and positive themed information and entertainment of high standards. So for you, readers and followers – Thank You!

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Looking ahead, the course will remain the same but hopefully with even more activity shared in the coming year. As always, the focus will be Entertaining, Informational and Educational. In the works for the new year are –

A continued focus on the natural world and conservation issues including the revival of nature interviews and features on the Blog by our assistant, “Rusty the Fairydiddle”, a Red Squirrel Reporter, as only a Red Squirrel can do them. Check out “Rusty Behind the Scenes — The Gray Fox Interview” for a sample.

Rusty the Fairdiddle, Red Squirrel Reporter on the Job!

A serialized Free Story or two on the Blog, similar to the “Ozarks Ostrich Crisis” which started it all a couple years ago.

More Free Reads, Poetry and other Short Works as inspiration and the muses allow.

Little Red Bear finds humans fascinating for one reason or another, so in addition a new series of interviews is planned on the Blog to include not only fellow writers and authors, but other creative and interesting folk as well. The list of those already agreeing to be interviewed include photographers of various disciplines, artists, authors and more.

“The greatest danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low, and achieving our mark.” ~ Michelangelo

Plans also include sharing more new teddy bears, raggedy dolls and other creations and information on the Blog, just for fun.

Milson, the Steampunk Bear– German Mohair, Glass Eyes, by James Milson, 2014

Roary- Cinnamon Curly Mohair Bear with Wobble Joints, Glass Eyes, Wearing a Rusty Jingle Bell.

Tuffie- Synthetic Faux Fur Bear with Wobble Joints and Picture Jasper Stone Pendant

Grumpy Gus- Synthetic Faux Mohair with an Iron Pyrite, Wire-wrapped Fool’s Gold Pendant

Fisher- Mohair Bear with Wobble Joints, Glass Eyes, and Carved Bone Fish Pendant

Sugar- Mohair Bear with Wire-wrapped Sea Glass Pendant

And — after months of “thinking” and note-making, writing on the next collection of “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” short stories began in earnest the past week. As you may recall, the full title of the first collection of stories was “The Adventures of Little Red Bear: The First Holler!” The next collection will be appropriately titled “The Adventures of Little Red Bear: The Second Holler Over!” Returning the main characters, it will also feature the introduction of some very new and colorful characters as fun and hijinks in the backwoods continues. And with those pesky weasels still around, we’re never really quite sure what may happen. Red and I are working towards a summer or early fall release, so please stay in touch for updates.

So Much Work, So Many Adventures, So Little Time!

Actually, staying in touch is pretty easy. Following the blog is as simple as signing up, with notifications of all new posts delivered directly to your email inbox. It is always Free, never any spam, and features a growing list of Free Reads, Information and Fun Stuff available anytime. Some easy links to follow the Blog and on Twitter are located in the column to the right. Just click here to “LIKE” and follow my Author Facebook Page and on Pinterest. Please join me on my Personal Facebook Page for a steady stream of positive and uplifting messages, recipes, music selections, shared artworks and photography from friends, and other fun.

As we move further into the new year, I expect the general loudness and rancor may increase as we approach the Presidential election in November. My intention is for all of my sites to serve as a mental oasis and refuge of quiet, peace, kindness and love for everyone. You are welcome to visit anytime.

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So, heading off into the new year and next set of Little Red Bear adventures, then. Thank You again for a wonderful and encouraging year! And please remember, the “Welcome” mat is always out, there’s a pitcher of tea waiting and cookies in the jar at all times; and comments, feedback, referrals and sharing are strongly encouraged and very much appreciated. As Little Red Bear is fond of saying — “A shared joy is a doubled joy.”

Hoping to see you stop by and visit often! — Jim (and Red!)

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“The Adventures of Little Red Bear: The First Holler!” Short Stories on Amazon. About an uncommonly special bear and his friends!

Little Red Bear Answers Reader Questions – “Hummingbird Spit! What Could Be Better?”

August 20, 2015August 8, 2016 / jrmilson / 2 Comments

Little Red Bear and I have received another reader question we thought it may be good to respond to for everyone. Well, a question and a comment really, and good information to pass along.

Reader Question from S. F. on holiday at an undisclosed beach resort in the U. K. –– “Dear Little Red Bear — Holiday reading, sunshine, and fresh sea air – what could be better?Thanks for translating Red, got plenty of buzzards’ breath but all out of catfish whiskers and the hummingbirds are being most uncooperative.”

Answer— For the benefit of those who have not read “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” yet, or may have unwisely skipped over the “Introduction”, what S. F. is referring to is that to save readers the difficulty and hassles of needing to translate all the different spoken animal languages and dialects back and forth as they read, Little Red Bear and I worked tirelessly to translate everything for you. Bears speaking to birds and rabbits, turtles speaking to bears, humans speaking to bears and foxes, weasels yammering on, etc. The pig is a different matter, and you will need to read for yourself to see what that is all about.

Information on the translation process was explained in the Introduction, along with many other things, and S. K. is referring to a few of the translation ingredients in her comment. And it points to why we decided to go ahead and take care of the translations issue for readers ahead of time. We didn’t charge extra for it. Little Red Bear just felt it a nice to thing to do for folks.

In response to S. K. then — “Holiday reading, sunshine, and fresh sea air – what could be better?” We can’t think right off of any better thing than being on holiday at the beach reading Little Red Bear stories, so you have us stumped with that one. And yes, we have found the hummingbirds to be problematic and difficult to work with at times, as it seems the later it gets into summer the more of a sugar high they are on, causing some predictably spiky attitudes. We are impressed with your having gathered sufficient quantities of the buzzard’s breath though, as that is where the translation process breaks down for many folks, unwilling to approach a turkey buzzard that closely. Little Red Bear sends a big paw pat on the back for that one!

As for the other, we could mail some dried catfish whiskers over for you, but find that fresh whiskers work much better and produce a clearer translation in the end. And since we have it all translated for you ahead of time anyway, we won’t bother to send any dried whiskers over to save you the mailing expense.

So, sorry we were stumped by that question, but want to thank you for writing in to let us know all that translation time and effort is helping readers out after all.

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So, a big thanks to S. F. for the comments! Remember folks, please keep those questions and letters coming. We’ll get to them as best we can here for you. Happy reading, and thanks as always for stopping by! And remember folks, the best sermons are lived, not preached. God bless, y’all. – Jim (and Red!)

Birds- Turkey Vulture close up via Google Images

“The Adventures of Little Red Bear” Short Stories on Amazon.

Old-fashioned, Family-friendly Stories and Fun for All Ages and Fitness Levels!

About an Uncommonly Special Bear and His Friends.

Little Red Bear Answers Reader Questions — “Angry Weasels! What To Do?”

August 13, 2015August 8, 2016 / jrmilson / Leave a comment

Little Red Bear and I are getting more and more questions from readers. So here’s another one, hoping to provide useful and life-saving information by sharing for all.

Reader Question from K. C. in Shriveled Branches, California – “Dear Little Red Bear — What should I do if confronted by an angry weasel?”

Answer— Another great question, because this seems to come up more often than most folks think. The problem is, weasels are just not big on negotiating, so trying to reason with them or attempting to discover the source of their anger is largely a waste of time, as most just wake up angry in the morning right off the start, and their mood seems to follow on downhill from there.

We recommend telling the weasel a really funny joke, and hope it dies laughing. It seemed to work very well for the Roger Rabbit folks. If you’re not particularly funny, then we recommend running away as fast as you can, because the longer you stand in front of the weasel the hungrier it’s going to get while the time passes. If you have wings, use them. Because we haven’t found the weasel yet that can fly more than two laps around the feedlot.

Weasels are never easy to deal with, because even when they tell you they’re going to behave and be your friend, they most likely ain’t. So take whatever a weasel says with a grain of salt. Or two. Good luck with ’em, and we’ll keep y’all in our thoughts. — Little Red Bear

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A big thanks to K.C. for the question! Remember folks, keep those questions and letters coming. We’ll get to them as best we can here for you. Happy reading, and thanks as always for stopping by! And remember folks, an angry weasel is considerably faster than a John Deere Tractor. Best to try and stay on their good side. If you can find one. – Jim (and Red!)

“The Adventures of Little Red Bear” Short Stories on Amazon.

Old-fashioned, Family-friendly Stories and Fun for All Ages and Fitness Levels!

About an Uncommonly Special Bear and His Friends.

Little Red Bear Answers Reader Questions — “Reading Safety Advisory!”

July 13, 2015August 8, 2016 / jrmilson / Leave a comment

“Letters. We get letters. We get lots and lots of letters.”

Little Red Bear and I have been receiving a number of questions from readers the past few weeks regarding “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” short stories collection, and after we talked about it while sitting around the campfire the other night with Albuquerque, Aunt Ivy and some of the others, Little Red Bear and I decided it might be a good idea to share some of the questions and answers with everyone. Here is the first one, what Red thought might be the most important question we have received so far.

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Reader Question from S. R. in Jolly River Falls, MN – “Dear Little Red Bear — Is there a time when it is not safe or prudent to read “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” short stories?”

Answer— That is a very good question! And it so happens, something we have looked into. From the beginning, we figured in all honesty, that we most likely wouldn’t be generating a New York Times Bestseller list of readers, so should try to protect and insure the safety of those we do accumulate along the way, being probably few in number. So as it turns out, we did research this very topic before we released the book on Amazon.

Here are the times and situations we determined as most unsafe or imprudent to read the stories, so accordingly are issuing the following Public Safety Advisory. A few instances we determined were—

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General Advisories –

Do Not Read “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” —

When operating a motor vehicle, aircraft or heavy machinery.

While swimming in a swamp with alligators.

While snorkeling with sharks.

While at work with a supervisor possessing questionable tastes in literature.

While in the bathtub or hot tub if reading on a laptop plugged into an electrical socket.

In a lightning storm if standing alone in an open area.

While skydiving if the main parachute has failed to deploy.

While riding a mule to the bottom of the Grand Canyon. The mules perfectly know the way of course, but in this one instance we feel you really should not miss the once in a lifetime views of the Canyon. Read later at basecamp.

While shaving with a straight razor.

When wandering unaccompanied by armed escort in lion country.

While cooking over an open flame. (This caution applies to the paperback version, only.)

While performing roofing or window washing work above the sixth floor of a building.

While surveying a buffalo herd. (It’s not really unsafe, per se. It’s just that bison have not made it into the stories yet and are still a little miffed about it. Just don’t let them see what you are reading and it should be okay. And of course, never roller skate in a buffalo herd whether you’re reading the book or not, but you most likely knew that one already.)

Industry Specific Advisories —

For Medical Professionals- do not read while performing or assisting in major surgeries and/or dental work.

For Baseball Players- do not read while batting or catching. Field position players may safely read during the lull in between pitches. Umpiring crews, as well. Reading the adventures while in the dugout and bullpen is highly recommended for all to relieve tedium. Reading the adventures is also highly recommended to pass the time for soccer goalies.

Reading Exemptions –

Members of Congress are exempted from reading “The Adventures of Little Red Bear”. While there is certainly a lot which could be learned from the stories for them, it is generally agreed that they just have too much meaningful work to do at this time to risk being distracted by fun and common sense.

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We hope this helped answer your important safety question regarding the reading of Red’s adventures. In most other instances, we have determined that it is both safe and prudent to read “The Adventures of Little Red Bear.” Indeed, highly recommended for clean family fun and reading entertainment! Thanks for the question S. R., and we’re hoping you enjoy the stories. Please remember to scrape your boots off before coming back inside from an adventure! We don’t want to be hearing about dirty floors from irate mothers. So please scrape your boots. Especially after a visit to Farmer Turner’s.

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Remember folks, keep those questions and letters coming. We’ll get to them as best we can here for you. Happy reading, and thanks as always for stopping by! And remember folks, every path has a few puddles in life. The sun will be back out soon enough to dry you off and help you on your way again. – Jim (and Red!)

“The Adventures of Little Red Bear” Short Stories on Amazon.

Old-fashioned, Family-friendly Stories and Fun for All Ages and Fitness Levels!

About an Uncommonly Special Bear and His Friends.

New Little Red Bear Video– “A Visit to Farmer Turner’s Farm!”

June 29, 2015 / jrmilson / Leave a comment

Farmer Turner is a good friend and neighbor of Little Red Bear and one of the recurring characters in “The Adventures of Little Red Bear” short story collection. Thru Farmer Turner and some others to be introduced in later story collections, we are able to introduce domestic animals, farming and agricultural topics and issues into the stories.

His farm is located a little ways from Little Red Bear’s cabin on Honey Hill, on the north side of Buttonbush Creek, and he has a little bit of everything going on there it seems. Red thought it might be fun to take everyone on a visit to Farmer Turner’s to meet some of his friends and other animals living on the farm, and is hoping you might bring any little ones you may have along for the trip, too.

This video is dedicated to our wonderful and helpful friends– Marilyn Schroeder keeping it real growing wheat in Nebraska, and the author Kathleen Creighton, the self-described “Farm Tamer” herself. Please check out Kathleen’s amazing collection of award-winning Romance stories on Amazon.

So here you go– “A Visit to Farmer Turner’s Farm.” As always, Little Red Bear reminds to view on full screen with the speakers on if possible. Have a nice time! Careful where you step, and thanks as always for stopping by! — Jim (and Red!)